Sunday, March 20

The Biggest Win In The Post-SAF Era :-D

Fuck me. That was amazing. That, no question, was our biggest win since Ferguson retired. For many fucking reasons.

Lose/draw, and we'd be struggling to make the Champions League. Which would send us backwards as a club when we're meant to be in the title-challenging stage of transition.

But we won, and we're gonna make that top four. Ok, we'll be standing still rather than competing for the league, but at least we won't be regressing.

I was there when Marcus Rashford saved our season. Yet again. And it was amazing.

Don't get me wrong. Ed Woodward needs to get fucked and so does VG, but thank fuck there's Rashford around to save us. :-D

Monday, February 29


Last Thursday, around 9.30pm, Manchester United were half an hour away from their worst moment in the last 30 years of the club’s history.

A team from Denmark nobody had heard of until the Europa League draw was made last December, were on their way to knock United out. The official lowest point in the post-Ferguson transition.

I was sat in my seat, in the Ferguson Stand, fearing the absolute worst. No way. This can’t happen. I won’t let this happen. It just can’t.


An 18-year-old boy from Wythenshawe stepped up. A United fan. Right in front of the Stretford End. Twice.

He saved it. He saved LVG. He saved United. He saved us from the worst possible moment for three decades.

Thank you, Marcus. Thank you for giving us hope, for denting Arsenal’s titles hopes, for reminding us that no matter who’s in charge, there is no better sight than watching a homegrown United graduate rise to stardom. :-)

Saturday, February 6


I hate Ed Woodward. Ok, maybe he’s a good bloke, maybe he donates half his wages to the NSPCC or something. But - as the CEO of Manchester United - I fucking hate him.

In fact, I’ve hated him for a while. I wrote a post about all the things he’d done wrong when he was a year into the job.

But if we appoint Jose Mourinho as the next manager of Manchester United, I will hate him even more.

As much as the man in charge of the football - Louis van Gaal - doesn’t understand what United is, the man in charge of the club knows even little.

He might be a good marketer, signing soul-selling commercial deals day after day with kangaroo food brands in Korea. (Although, how hard can it be to slut the world’s biggest club out to every fucking hitchhiker with an audience?)

But as the man who sacked Moyes to the media before the poor bloke knew himself, who prostitutes United’s good name to every world-class player that’s just had a row with their manager, who briefs journalists at every nook and cranny to prove he’s on top of things, who was too scared to sack van Gaal when he really should have… he’s a disgrace to the role and should resign in apology.

But now there’s this. Jose Mourinho.

Of course Mourinho’s a great manager. You’d be stupid to deny that. But just because Weetos is a great cereal, doesn’t mean it should be served in porcelain.

Mourinho is not a United manager. He makes everything about him, he’s got no fucking class and he doesn’t promote youth.

Putting him in charge would drive United further away from the classic, traditional mould established by Busby and Ferguson, and bang into the cheap materialism set forth by the oil money clubs like City and Chelsea.

Simply hiring him to compete for trophies because the noisy neighbours just appointed their latest frontman is insane. It shows a lack of respect for United’s history and an utter bearhug to mercenary heaven.

After Ferguson left, United should have stuck his laws on the fucking wall and made sure they stayed there forever. ’Never say die’, ‘Free-flowing attack-minded football’, ‘Promote youth’, ‘Influence refs’, ‘Don’t tell the media everything’, ‘Keep the egos in check’, etc.

But United have already changed way too much under van Gaal, and instead of behaving more like a club who knows itself and wants to return to a civilised identity, we’re now going backwards because of Woodward’s - and it is Woodward - money-grubbing recklessness.

Please, Mr Glazers. Sack this cunt and give me my club back. :-(

Saturday, December 19

Stick A Fork In Me: I'm Done

Friday, December 11

Of Course You Have To Meet These Expectations, You Dumb Fuck. That's The Fucking Point!

“A club as Manchester United has to win - that’s the past. That’s the past. You have to analyse the club now and you cannot compare it with ten years ago.

“There is an evolution in football. In European football. That kind of stuff.

“I have to meet expectations from five, ten years ago.”

Christ fucking alive. He really doesn't get it, does he?